The Exiled Shalash

Friday, March 31, 2006

Ahmad Chalabi for Prime Minister?!?

This is the latest, actually the craziest and maybe even the weirdest news from Iraq, Doctah Ahmad Abdulhadi Abdulhussein al-Chalabi may well be the nominee for the post of Prime Minister. I know I know, he didn't win any seats and he's not even part of the United Iraqi Alliance, but as weird as this sounds, there really are no rules against that. Here's what's against it, I am to start with and I am pretty sure Iran and I are on the same page here.

Ambassador Zalmay Khalilzad, better known to the Americans as "Zal," you know to de-Afghanize his origins would love such a choice because let's face it, "doctah" Ahmad Chalabi is still the neo-cons' favorite man in Iraq. No WMD, no al-Qaeda connection, no problem!

Ahmad Chalabi has been extremely supportive of Ja'afari's nomination not because there is any love there, but that's Ahmad, he likes to support idiots because he can manipulate idiots. Remember the Najaf crisis? Remember how Muqtada al-Sadr (may he...) went from a terrorist who likes to play PlayStation to a politician who likes to play PlayStation. That was Ahmad's work. Now Ahmad has found himself another toy, Ibrahim al-Eshakher Ja'afari. Amazing indeed.

I don't hate Chalabi, I give a lot of credit to Chalabi for helping liberate Iraq, and let me just add that Chalabi is 100 times better than both Ja'afari and Abdulmahdi combined, but are you kidding me? Is the UIA so stupid as to impose on the Iraqis a man who did not even win one seat? Well the answer to the question is yes, they are that stupid because anybody who cannot get over the fact that immam Hussein was killed a zillion years ago is pretty dumb, but seriously, will that not prove that this so called alliance is a joke?!?

Now let's talk a bit about our very dear next door neighbors, no, not the Chalabi-loving Jordanians because Sunnis don't matter, but rather, the Eye-Ranians! Oh what I would do to see the expression on Khamna'i's face when he hears the news that Chalabi is up for the top job at the new Shi'istan! Iran wants Abdulmahdi and it can tolerate Ja'afari but Chalabi? Nope.

I've always wondered about what to do with Ahmad Chalabi, because whether we like it or not, he's not going anywhere. He doesn't have to win seats for him to be powerful, he just needs to be alive, the man is so many things, but one thing nobody can dispute is that he's a brilliant politician.

So are you ready for the moment of truth?

Ahmad Chalabi should be given the job of director of Iraq's mukhabarat. If he is given that job, he'll crush the insurgency in six months, isn't this the same man who unseated Saddam? We just have to make sure that his salary is close to a billion dollars a year because well who are we kidding, this is "doctah" Chalabi, he needs to be well-paid or he won't be too focused.


  • I sure hope you are wrong about Chalabi! Ha ha! p.s. I think the neocons have disowned Chalabi since he was buddy-buddy with goofball of Iran.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:52 AM  

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