Nuri al-Maliki in Washington

Our Prime Minister, Mr. Nuri al-Maliki about whom I know next to nothing (that is a scary thing my friends because if there is one thing at which I am good is that I know these clowns pretty damned well) will be visiting Washington to meet with Bush.

If there were no rules to these meetings, if there was no such thing called diplomacy and if al-Maliki had balls, he would say something along the following lines to the leader of the free world:

George, I swear to you by Abi 'Abdullahi al-Husayn (peace be upon him) that the Lebanese Islamic resistance led by Sayyid Hassan Nassrallah is the most noble movement. The Jews (may God exterminate them) have been killing Shi'as in southern Lebanon since 1982 and the only man who stands for them is Sayyid Hassan Nassrallah. You see Texan boy, we're not against tyranny per se, we might have seemed to you that we were liberal democrats when we were condemning Saddam, but that's because Saddam was a Sunni. Have you ever seen us condemn Iran? No, and you never will because the Islamic Republic is a Shi'a republic and soon we'll turn Iraq into something that looks like Iran. Don't worry George, we won't be bullies in the neighborhood, but we certainly won't be a model for the region either.

Instead, he will say something like this:

Thank you Mr. President for your invitation. I would like to take advantage of this opportunity to express my heartfelt gratitude to the men and women of the United States armed forces who so selflessly liberated us from Saddam's evil regime. We've made tremendous progress in fighting the insurgency, we killed al-Zarqawi...

Ahhhh diplomacy.

My point is, why the hell does al-Maliki need to come to Washington? What will he say that we don't already know? Why should the U.S. taxpayers pay for this man's visit who, by the way will be visiting with no less than 50 people with him (this is how Ja'fari used to visit)? al-Maliki will formally ask the United States to stay in Iraq until the job is done so that Bush can say, "the Eye-Rakis are asking us to stay..." I pity these fools, I pity them all.